Resilient to Trauma

Hi there! I'm new to blogging but writing has always been an outlet for me and I have always wanted to create a blog. I've been through a lot in my life and I'm sure you have too. At the moment, I'm currently battling my addictions to alcohol. This year I'm in a state of slowly identifying myself and trying to figure out where I belong in this life as I try to navigate the mental health system where I live. Believe me when I say, the mental health system is not the most ideal especially for those with personality disorders. Even though we have all these mental health days, there's still that shame & stigma entrenched with mental health, mental illness and addictions.

I need to add here that at the age of 23 years old I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, major depression, generalized anxiety disorder, and complex post traumatic stress disorder. At the age of 26 years old, I was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. I always knew that there was some type of learning/processing disorder in my childhood as I struggled to navigate school and the homework that my teachers assigned. In postsecondary, I struggled with little support but a great support network of friends. Before my diagnosis, I struggled with my addiction to alcohol and being unmedicated. Anti-depressants never helped me at all. ADHD medication has helped tremendously. I don't do anti-depressants or anti-psychotics; I just need my ADHD medication and that's how I can now get through my life. Currently I'm working one-on-one with a psychotherapist who specializes in trauma, borderline personality disorder and in general mental health concerns. I'm also eager and looking into a lot of online or in-person Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) support groups. However with lack of funding, expense and lengthy waitlists, it's literally impossible to get into a good DBT group. Affordability has always been a problem for me in terms of reaching out for supports.

In conclusion, I know that it is possible to seek the right type of supports. I've been there before. I used to be receptive to getting help for myself. My walls have been up for a few years and I'm trying to eagerly reach out these days. I know it is possible but finding myself will not happen overnight. I'll go through a ton of obstacles and often cry myself to sleep on some nights. However, I don't and refuse to give up.

Life is a constant journey and we have to keep fighting for the things we want.









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